Well, I am now officially in a new decade of life. My 60th birthday came, was duly celebrated and is now a pleasant memory. For just about the whole year leading up to turning 60, I thought about what I wanted to do to mark this significant life passage. (Being 60 probably means I can no longer call myself middle aged.) Doing something bold and symbolic seemed like a great way to move into a new decade. Parasailing fit the bill. It would be bold because I have a fear of heights and don't care for thrill rides. And it would be symbolic of being able to focus on my needs at this stage of life. Years ago (when I must have been more daring) I had avoided parasailing in Mexico because it seemed like an irresponsible activity for a parent of a two-year old.

Did I parasail on my milestone birthday? No. I realized that one of the gifts of this life stage is greater freedom to do what I want to do, and the more I thought about it the more I realized I really didn't want to parasail. So instead of being bold, I spent the day on a beautiful beach with good friends. That evening my friends prepared a wonderful meal, and we celebrated with good food, fine wine, and the comfort of treasured friends. It was much better than parasailing.

Turning sixty is a major life transition, and I have found myself more aware of the importance of experiencing each day as a precious gift. I sometimes feel a vague sense of inner pressure to not squander this wonderful time. As my husband likes to say, "It's show-time." Or, in other words now is the time to do those things we always said we would get to "one day." So, my goal for this sixtieth year of life is to identify and begin to pursue those dreams and goals. Sounds like a pretty exciting year.

WHAT WE KNOW
We all age and if we are lucky, we experience milestone birthdays. With aging comes change. We transition from one life stage to another, from what we know to something new. How we approach those transitions makes a huge difference in the quality of our lives. We may thrive in transition or we may merely cope. Marcia Bench, author or Thriving in Transition, identifies characteristics of thrivers and copers.

Copers resist change rather than finding peace in change. Characteristics of copers include needing control, mistrusting, disconnecting from spirituality, lacking purpose, blaming, being out of touch with feelings, thinking negatively, lacking balance, and lacking a healthy support system.

Thrivers, on the other hand, are similar to what Abraham Maslow and Charles Garfield describe as "peak performers." They share six clusters of traits, including the following: WHAT WE CAN DO
We can all move toward thriving in transition. Where are you on the coping/thriving continuum? How can you move more toward being a thriver? One way to become more of a thriver is to identify a life transition you are experiencing and then answer the following questions.

What are you telling yourself about transition?

Who supports and encourages you in this transition?

What are you doing to support yourself?

What is your life purpose?

What has to change in your life?

What can you learn from this?

What is one thing you can do this week to become more of a thriver?